Maybe you just haven’t suffered enough

“Maybe you just haven’t suffered enough”, I heard my teacher say.

“Once you suffer enough and being stuck in the same patterns feels absolutely unbearable, you will be ready to change.”

Although at the time I stared at him in despair feeling as if I been punched in the stomach, I now look back, almost a decade later having coached hundreds of clients, and can confirm the truth in the words that tasted like bitter medicine.

So it usually is, my loves, often people that reach out for guidance tend to be those that have finally gotten sick and tired of existing a certain way.

We are stubborn creatures, humans.

We tend to resist change if we can get away with it (for years! decades! lifetimes!). We hang on and on to relationships that we know are no longer life-giving, we stay for too long in soul-sucking jobs, we righteously defend our views and behaviours, we stick to known routines and foods and places and drinks and conversation topics and complaints… we delay as much as possible doing anything that may bring big changes to our inner and outer worlds.

As the saying goes, “we rather stay in a known hell, than risk an unknown heaven”.

However, if we’re lucky enough, there comes a time when our bs get’s too loud, too much, too heavy, too intense, too suffocating… and it is *then* that we finally arrive (on our own time, with full conviction, not ever wanting to go back to the way things were come what may) to the ripeness needed for transformation.

To be clear, nobody can rush or push or force this readiness no more than we can rush a fig into its soft purple sweetness. The medicine is only available once the individual acknowledges the graveness of their condition and wants it more than *anything*.

Thus, we are invited to unclench and surrender the expired ways and outdated paradigms that stopped serving us long ago -

to step into the fresh wildness of a new world.