The freedom of unbecoming
We were at a bakery in East London.
After eyeing the menu, my friend asked me if I was vegan? vegetarian?
I am nothing, I replied. I used to be everything and now I’m practicing being nothing.
After a while of being a restaurant’s worst nightmare ‘no cheese please, also do you have gluten free, sorry I don’t mean to be a bother but I’m actually vegan…’ I exhausted myself into being nothing.
Unbecoming has become an exploration I’ve extended to every area of my life.
Have you tried it?
Letting go of who you thought you were, releasing what you thought you knew about yourself?
Unsticking the labels you’ve carried in your forehead for way too long?
Haven’t you noticed you outgrew them years ago?
You thought those labels described you, but somewhere along the way you ended up moulding yourself to fit those very labels.
Labels served you at the beginning, and now here you are, serving THEM.
Maybe you started making those labels your identity.
Now fear is the glue that holds them in place because, wow what would be left without the labels? Who would you be?
Rip ‘em off. No label will ever be big enough to describe you. All of you.
I’m an introvert. Sometimes.
I’m an extrovert. Sometimes.
I feel deeply connected to the cosmos. Sometimes.
I feel murderous when someone’s walking slowly in front of me. Sometimes.
So… how could we define ourselves by qualities that come and go?
Allow yourself to play outside of the tight box you’ve built as “your” personality.
Colour outside the lines of the character you’ve created. See what happens.
Start celebrating those “Oh, I don’t feel like myself”. Good. That probably means you are starting to feel more like your Self.
Liberation from the script we’ve been playing by default allows us to try new textures to the ones we’ve been reaching for again and again.
Because, guess what? When you’re nothing… you get to be everything.
One of those paradoxes of life, ye know?
Go off script. Improvise. Meet the moment with curiosity. Meet yourself in the moment with curiosity.
Being fully alive is allowing ourselves to respond to the moment in a way that is fresh and aligned to what is unfolding.
Even if that means you’ll surprise others… and yourself.