Ditching the 'not good enough' feeling

I’m gonna get a bit intimate here. Hope you don’t mind.

So I’ve been meeting cool new people lately. And every time I was about to meet up with em I would hear a voice say: “oh. you’re wearing *that*? well, you better be extra smart and nice so they’ll think you’re cool”.

And for a second I believed that voice— until I was like WAIT A SEC.

I’m going to show up as myself. 100%. no special makeup. no rehearsed random but interesting facts to share. no extra effort to laugh at jokes that aren’t funny.

What’s up with that part that feels like who I am is not good enough? That I somehow need to put on a character to be liked? URGH.

Look, I’ve tried it. And it felt uncomfortable, awkward, and exhausting. I’m not very good at pretending to be a “better” version of myself, you see.

And btw you can’t fake energy. Which means no matter how well you pretend to be this fab, intellectual “likeable” you, people will energetically FEEL what’s going on (even if they aren’t aware of it).

You know, when you’ve met someone who acted like a nice person but you felt something was “off” about them? Well, that’s probably what was going on.

And listen, in my experience, this healing of the deeply rooted ‘need to be liked’ virus takes time.

It requires commitment.

And lots and lots of courage.

Why?

Because showing up as you are feels very vulnerable. There’s no protective layers, no scripts, nothing to blame if things don’t go as planned.

And if they don’t like you for who you really are well, it pretty much feels like GAME OVER.

It’s as if you had a confirmation of your deepest and darkest fears: that who you really are is indeed unlikeable, and unlovable.

Yet, as long as we’re putting our value on what others say, feel or think of us we’re giving our power away.

SO I’m committing to claiming back my power. To being so at home within myself masks stop being an option. To stop adjusting myself to the likes and needs of others. To showing up exactly as I am.

What you say, wanna join me?